nixtress's Diaryland Diary

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From the innocent to the not-so-innocent

My Trevor has a girlfriend. Now, if you ask him, she's not a girlfriend. She's just a girl and a friend.
He came home today and said there was a girl who was "freaky". Apparently, this young lady has been making an effort at sitting next to Trev whenever it's feasibly possible. She also chases him on the playground. Ryan, at this point, spouts that "she's got a cru-u-u-sh", which Trevor, of course, had to tackle and begin pummeling him for.
Later, I asked him what her name was and if he was embarassed, to which he replied that Amanda wasn't his girlfriend. He's very adamant about that. I think it's adorable. He's never really shown any interest in girls, never even ackowledged that he'll EVER have an interest in them... he's growing up.
I remember when my brother B. began having an interest in girls. He would literally change colors when I'd ask him questions, and I could almost see him writhing inside his skin, he was so uncomfortable with even the idea of liking girls. Cracked me up.
I'm feeling better today, less snuffly but a little gravelly in the throat. I'm thinking that there's just got to be something inside this house that I'm allergic to. Not sure, now, whether to see an allergist or a regular doc.
At any rate, the idea that I'm even contemplating seeing a doctor is telling--I've never been one to visit doctors much.
***
I need laid. Not the lovey dovey, touchy feely sort (although that would be peachy keen at a later time) but more the semi-aggressive, pounding, visceral sort of sex. The kind where you want the other person so much it hurts, and your body is starving and thirsting, and you lose yourself completely in the other's flesh. Yep. I want to fuck so hard that I still feel them inside me after, ache from the inside out in such a good way. I want my skin marked, and tender, want to revel in the sore muscles that come with, the exhaustion. I want to feel my fingernails gripping shoulders and back, thighs rubbing hips, pelvis grinding.
Want.
Happy Monday night.
N.

8:21 p.m. - 2004-11-08

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