nixtress's Diaryland Diary

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Rollercoaster ridin'

I've gone through all sorts of weird mood shifts today. Ryan was home because of his pink eye and he went with me to finish scraping paint and wallpaper from the walls of a friend's bathroom. (It's amazing the things I find myself doing to earn money, nowadays).
All through that, and the cleanup, I was fine. Dandy, even. Keeping busy does that for me. Tonight at work, I was upbeat and even chipper, in between fits of coughing. No can takey the hydrocodone while trying to successfully count money or operate a cash register. I'd be the newest town charity!
I got home and after greeting all the fourlegged beasties, strippin' and getting comfy and popping on the 'puter, let myself finally realize that not only am I not going to be able to cover the boys' baseball fees that'll be due at signup on Saturday, but I'm not going to even make half my car payment this time. This sucks in ways I can't even put words to. The car payment is bad enough. Now I get to try to explain this to the Bill Vultures over there and then deal with the frequent calls that come when you get behind on payments. I also have to tell my sons that they won't be playing ball this summer, unless some miracle occurs or I can figure out some way to come up with the funds needed to cover it. I've got some more thinking to do but I don't know that there's an answer to this one.
I've applied all over the place, even at a temp agency. I've also applied to several of the home health care places around town. Maybe I can get paid to do what I already am--taking care of the elderly. I don't know that they make very good money but anything above $6.50 an hour will be an improvement.
So, yeah. I've run the gamut from being blissfully busy to being brutally clear.
Ryan goes back to school tomorrow and I have a day of cleaning planned. I'm actually looking forward to it. Not only does the house need it but it's a sort of catharsis for me. A way to focus on something more positive, with a visible end result.
Spring is coming. I can see it in the returning birds and the change in the ground. I can smell it, even. The deer have begun to change their paths through the back field, the way they do when the farmer begins to plow. Another month and it'll be Spring break here.
Yowza. Time flies when you're not paying attention, eh?
Happy almost Friday.
N.

11:11 p.m. - 2005-02-24

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